If ever there was a myth created from distant legend, then that of the Yummy Mummy must be it.
Surely...
Or, more to the point, if ever there was a myth created by the male of the species then this must be the one.
The Yummy Mummy myth is the one that is causing me the most annoyance today.
Let’s be honest they do not exist, it is impossible to be one, and the whole notion has been created the world over by men in the vain hope that they might not get home from work and find their wives passed out on the couch through sheer exhaustion dressed in a tracksuit with not a hint of make-up on their faces.
Most mums would happily collapse at the end of a long day of ferrying children around, dealing with homework, discipline and trying to feed their family a nutritional meal on a shoe-string budget.
But oh no! Instead of collapsing in a heap and crawling our sorry arses off to bed, we have to be standing upright, smiling pleasantly, pretending that we love to be plastered in sick all day and that our little cherubs who are now all squeaky clean and smelling of shampoo and bubbles have not been running around like little devils covered in a day long battle against food and cleanliness of any kind.
How many things does a woman give up in the name of motherhood? Our body, our health, our own space, our sanity! And yes, we love our children dearly, more so then we ever thought possible. We would lay ourselves in-front of an onslaught of double-decker buses if we thought we could save them; but please just do not expect us to smile about it constantly, or bake cakes to celebrate.
"Yay, I am a Mum, here is the three tiered chocolate cake with fondant icing I made to celebrate!" it's just not going to happen, not in this house anyway.
The whole situation reminds me of other 'fad's' over the years, ones which always have a suspiciously male orientated theme behind them.
For instance - Women must get paid the same as men - remember this one from a decade or so back.
NO you idiots, women should get paid a hell of a lot more than men for doing a hell of a lot more than men. Because yes, lots of lovely ladies slog their soul's out in offices all day long, battling it out to be taken seriously whilst also attempting to take under the desk calls from childcare and frantic nannies informing them of children's temperatures, detention and a whole host of other problems that can crop up throughout the day. When they leave the office at the end of the day it is to go home and put their mummy hat on and sit and give their whole attention to another being, or a whole family of other beings all of who want their fair slice of attention.
So yes, in my very humble view women should get paid more for effectively doing two jobs at once, keeping the universe spinning and being Super woman. If not super woman herself then at least a woman who is super.
Obviously I am having a cranky couple of days - it's been bad what can I say - however this evening I shall be vertical, not horizontal as I would want, and I shall be smiling, the floors will be clean and the dinner will be cooked. However the ironing basket will still be in place in the lounge where it has taken up permanent residence, although it may be teetering a little bit higher then yesterday and there will most definitely be no cakes baked whatsoever.
Yes I am a mummy, and sometimes I can make an effort to be just a little yummy (if the stars are aligned correctly and there is a fair wind) however the two things are not inclusive of each other and quite frankly I would rather conserve what little energy I have left and concentrate on being a good mummy and forget all about the yummy.
For instance - Women must get paid the same as men - remember this one from a decade or so back.
NO you idiots, women should get paid a hell of a lot more than men for doing a hell of a lot more than men. Because yes, lots of lovely ladies slog their soul's out in offices all day long, battling it out to be taken seriously whilst also attempting to take under the desk calls from childcare and frantic nannies informing them of children's temperatures, detention and a whole host of other problems that can crop up throughout the day. When they leave the office at the end of the day it is to go home and put their mummy hat on and sit and give their whole attention to another being, or a whole family of other beings all of who want their fair slice of attention.
So yes, in my very humble view women should get paid more for effectively doing two jobs at once, keeping the universe spinning and being Super woman. If not super woman herself then at least a woman who is super.
Obviously I am having a cranky couple of days - it's been bad what can I say - however this evening I shall be vertical, not horizontal as I would want, and I shall be smiling, the floors will be clean and the dinner will be cooked. However the ironing basket will still be in place in the lounge where it has taken up permanent residence, although it may be teetering a little bit higher then yesterday and there will most definitely be no cakes baked whatsoever.
Yes I am a mummy, and sometimes I can make an effort to be just a little yummy (if the stars are aligned correctly and there is a fair wind) however the two things are not inclusive of each other and quite frankly I would rather conserve what little energy I have left and concentrate on being a good mummy and forget all about the yummy.
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